Dr. Abiodun Durojaye arrived in the United States at nine years old from Nigeria, and by fourth grade she had learned two things: she was Black in America, and the name her father gave her would not fit in the spaces she was trying to enter.
In this episode of Ronderings, Ron sits down with Dr. Abiodun Durojaye, founder of AsidaLove and former CEO of Urban Alliance, to talk about identity, gratitude, motherhood, and why love belongs in leadership conversations that usually leave it out.
Abiodun grew up the daughter of a Nigerian mother raising four children alone in a new country. Every one of those children now holds at least a doctorate. She went on to the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign, joined Delta Sigma Theta, and after graduation packed her bags for Nigeria to serve in the National Youth Service Corps. That year in camp, fetching water for a bath in front of thousands of strangers, is where she learned the line she still lives by. Authenticity is a privilege. Check yourself at the door. She also met her husband there.
Then came the part of her story most people do not see. Two of her three daughters were born micro-preemie, one at 24 weeks and one at 23, each weighing about a pound. Five-month NICU stays. Holidays in the hospital. She finished her dissertation in those rooms because work became the only thing that kept her upright. Ron and Abiodun talk about what that kind of endurance costs, and the day she pulled her oldest out of school at 11 a.m. to go bra shopping because grace matters too.
Now Abiodun is building AsidaLove, a movement rooted in the belief that love is a strategy, not a sentiment. She is planning a For Her, By Her convening in Chicago for women of color navigating transition, and writing a memoir about her NICU years and what kept her going.
Tune in to hear why empathy is strength, why presence is the real work of leadership, and what it means to check yourself at the door.
Chapters:
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02:36 Meet Dr. Abiodun Durojaye, first-generation Nigerian
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07:22 Fourth grade at Reavis Elementary and the day Abiodun learned she was Black
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11:13 The women whose shoulders Abiodun stands on
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13:38 UIUC, the Deltas, and her line sisters
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15:11 Bags packed for Nigeria at the end of college
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15:42 A year in the NYSC camp, pay little to nothing
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16:41 The Nigerian man she swore she would never marry
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22:25 Authenticity is a privilege, so check yourself at the door
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27:03 Three daughters, two NICU babies, and the book she is writing
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30:34 Twenty-three weeks, one pound, and the decision no mother should make
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33:23 A mother's fight when the medicine cracked her daughter's ribs
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34:39 The dissertation as a distraction from the NICU
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40:02 AsidaLove: a movement rooted in community and love
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41:48 For Her, By Her, the Chicago convening Abiodun is dreaming up
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46:13 Asida, the warm dish that sticks to you
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49:23 Her year of yes and being obedient to what is next
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53:18 Love as strategy and empathy as strength
Links:
Instagram:
www.instagram.com/duro_itsabi Abiodun is someone you want in your corner. Follow her for AsidaLove, the For Her, By Her convening in Chicago, and the memoir that is coming.
Episode 90
